dysTalk Outsider Looking In What Do I Do - Dyspraxia - Forum - dysTalk

Hi

My boyfriends son is 8 years old and my daughter is 4 mths older, the differences in their ability is astounding and I have to be honest I've not always had a lot of patience with my boyfriends 'clumsy, bad writing, and nervous scared' son. I generally only see him a couple times a week and for the evening. However we have just returned from 2 week holiday where I was with him 24/7 My boyfriend seems oblivious to any real problems or is just ignoring it, his ex's family are known to me and again they dont seem to think anything is wrong. i've come back and looked online at his symptoms and Dypraxia seems to fit, although I'm not sure as I'm no expert. Hence this post for advice. He looks like most of the time he's in a world of his own, his writing is very imature more like 2/3 yr old. He bumps into things, slips, is scared of being in a room on his own and cant sleep without the tv on, he constantly mumbles and doesnt pronounce his words properly,(but when really pushed will do so,in an angry manner)cant cut his own food and his manners are very poor, he cant blow his nose properly, clean his teeth, and when dressing himself his seams on his underpants can be totally twisted round and he doesnt seem to realise it, when he drinks he gets the juice all over his upper lip and dribbles and again doesnt seem to notice, he's had one-one swimming lessons with no luck and when i tried to teach him on holiday he just couldnt grasp it, and kept going under water. when he falls over and his dad goes to help he gets very angry and shouts and screams that it's his dads fault, thus losing any sympathy he may get as he gets told off for shouting at his dad. if he thinks he may be bleeding he totally over reacts and goes absloutely crazy. I'm ashamed to say my daughters and myself have rolled our eyes and even giggled at his reactions and slips etc, and with the manners etc I just presumed no-one has been teachng him properly,and his dad doesnt pick him up on it, so i feel awkward being the one who constantly says 'eat properly' then when I've tried its as though he just forgets. his normal posture is lollopy with his mouth hanging open, I would describe his arms and legs as though he were a doll whose limbs have been over twisted and just seem to spin/hang with no restistance. I'm writing this as I really think there is something more to his behaviour/actions I hate to think of him growing up and not getting any better and these normal every day things and no-one taking a blind bit of notice and just letting him get on with it, and would like to know if you think Dyspraxia sounds a reasonable diagnosis. I dont know what to do after that as no-one seems to think its more than him being clumsy and not thinking about what he's doing. I dont know how I'd bring the subject up to his dad, its a very delicate thing, no-one at school seems to have picked it up. Thank you

11/09/2010 17:00:51
concerned girlfriend

Hi there,

Its a very tricky situation. As your not his legal gaurdian you wouldnt be able to intervene medically (i.e. take him to the doctors for tests) and if the shcool is not noticing an issue with the work he's producing then they are unlikely to step in.

Diagnosing kids is dangerous territory as non-qualified people. We tend to pick up on little things and let our minds wander with it. He could have dyspraxia or he could just be an ordinary 8 year old boy who's a bit clumsy. The only person who can tell you is a qualified doctor working in that field.

If you really are worried and care for this boy then speak to your boyfriend and remember you are onyl acting with ALL THEIR best interests at heart, not just the childs'.

Hope this helps!

Ollie

15/09/2010 14:09:51
Ollie Mann